The Vicious Cycle

Earlier, I wrote “12 Types and Examples of Cognitive Distortions.” I later then asked you guys if you have solutions such as personal experiences for overcoming them (here). I read most of them and they were all fantastic. Specifically, one of you emailed me with whole list of solutions to share with everyone.  Here they are: 

Mind Reading - Confront the person instead of trying to mind read them. For example, tell them what’s been on your mind and ask them to verify if it’s true. Say something like “I’ve been thinking that you possibly like me, is that true?”

Catastrophize - It’s hard to believe that there is hope when it seems like the future is all black and gray. This one is tough to overcome when something bad happens to us as our emotions run high. However, over time, we can learn to prove our fate wrong. 

Filtering -  If you do remember the bad, then try and remember the good, balance out the memories. Yes there was that time that little Susan tried to make your life hell, but then again there was also that time where everyone had a water balloon fight and you had a lot of fun. 

Polarized thinking – think of it as… a person can’t be completely bad, and a person can’t be completely good either. There is always something that’ll make someone look bad even though people think of him/her as good and vice versa.

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savipra:

Have you asked yourself on how you can motivate your “friend” to be “more than friends” with you? To be a boyfriend, girlfriend, partner, or lover? How do you escape the friend zone?

What is the Friend Zone?

For those who don’t know the term, “the friend zone” refers to a situation where one individual in a friendship develops more intense feelings and wants to become “more than friends” with the other person. Most often than not, the other person is unaware of this interest and is contented with the friends-only arrangement. As a result, the one liking the other gets stuck in “the friend zone” can’t transition from “friends” to “more than friends.”

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We all know those people who just seem like they would be a really great boyfriend or girlfriend to have. They have a ton of fun and don’t get hung up on nagging or being jealous. Here are 10 tips on how to be a cool boyfriend/girlfriend yourself:

1.    Have a life. Being independent and having your own life, your own goals, friends, etc is one of the coolest things you can do in a relationship. You’ll always be interesting to be around and your partner will feel lucky to have you.

2.    Get along with their friends and families. Your partner will think it’s really cool if all of their buddies and their families like you and want to have you around. No one wants to date that person that no one wants to be around.

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